I've been to many places where other great men have discovered beyond the time line of history. from the great Plain of the African wild to the dreadful cold of Northern Iceland. Seeing mankind uncover their own mistakes and triumph through out the ages brought me dis pare and yet hope. Walking in the streets of the Cities where everything congregate. whether is human,angels,demons,or even the half breeds perhaps, are infecting the city with their smells of Hunger,Greed,Lust,Self Righteousness, in the name of Him and so on. but one thing is still certain, we Humans are still just animals. instead of sinking our teeth into each others flesh we have come to known the way of doing it by other means, Merely leveling the playing field so to speak. the power to do anything, the power to determine a living person's death, the right to give judgment as i see fit, hahahahahaahahh!!!! it seems as if the whole world is with in my grasp. my 4 weeks at my job has made my shirt covered in blood and stank of sweat its time to go back to the home away from home..heh...

After i returned homed two days ago, i began to focus on the other life i left behind. The friends with their drunk smiles on their faces, the carelessness of them defining them self in their expression around the bon fire party. of course i was enjoying my self as well, several cups of strong liquor and some female company was all there was to it, although every ones in a while things seems to comes back into the clear but i will always take another sip of the drink and just fade away.

When i closed my eyes, i still see those who i have wronged. life that were not meant to be taken was just a never none existence under the smoke of my gun barrel, people's life that i destroyed through a simple signature on a piece of wood. those memories will hunt me for ever... so i tried to keep my eyes open and talk to this beauty that was sitting with me, as the night goes on we get more drunk more stupid, but we will always live in the moment, and live like there's no tomorrow....